<$BlogRSDUrl$>
The Mercenary       The Soul          The Fire          Welcome to Darkschunt...      Fire Poppies        Power             The Warrior      The House   The Guardian 
& The Lover                                                                                                                                   & Grief                                       of Justice            of Fire         



Wednesday, December 29, 2004

And how was your Christmas day???
Well, none of my presents were surprises since I pretty much picked most of them out myself and my sister, at the very least, showed sincere delight with her present (she should, it cost me a fortune!) and the rest of the family displayed a relatively good show of gratitude as they should. Pah. Ingrates.
Me and Potato went for the midnight mass for Christmas Eve, with both of us wondering why we were going since no one else seemed to be going this year. We ended up sitting on a bench outside and criticizing everyone (lousy clothes, no cute guys) and everything about our church. Mass was terrible! What happened to the Christmas plays? The choirs? The cute altarboys in their blood red robes? They didn't even have the blood red robes this year! Where were all the fun Christmas decorations - the little snowmen and snowy cottage ornaments that they recycled every year? Why did they have to paint our once-beautiful church such a yucky yellow color? I mean, I'm not exactly in the running for Ms. Holy (more like in the running for the first to be burnt at the stake) but honestly. This is too much. This is another example of things which you never except to change changing. I always imagined I'd go to this church forever and see my other unholy friends here forever and get married here and bring my kids here and send them to confirmation and let them mix with my unholy friends' unholy kids but at this rate I don't think I'll last long at this church. Not at the rate it's going. No one fun even goes to this church anymore. At least the church in the Most Isolated City in the World that I went to this past year got points for super-Gothic architecture that looks out of a movie set where heroes fight vampires.
Things changing all the time...always happening now...Everything changes. Nothing ever stays the same, even the things you feel would always stay the same. But what can you do but bow and bend and follow the winds of change?
Potato and I left early with Diaphragma. We went back to Potato's house where Carrot and some of his friends had already started the flames of a bbq. So we just ate and drank lots of red wine.
Someone (I can't remember who) pointed out a couple of things while Kelly-Mandy and I were hanging out at Laughing Liz's place tonight. 1) Christmas is probably one of the most depressing holidays of all time, which if you think about it, is quite true, and is probably because of all that pressure to have a perfect and jolly Christmas and 2) things like New Year's, Christmas, and Valentine's Day can sometimes be such a pain in the ass.
Today was musical day! Watched the Phantom of the Opera at Midvalley Mall and...get yourself ready for this...BARBIE!!!!!! Yes, yours truly has finally gotten her hands on the latest Barbie movie! The Princess and the Pauper! I got all giddy just looking at the girly pink cover. A lot of people I know are shaking their heads at me, my mom included. My sister supports me. And, you know what, the songs are nice.



(0) comments

Thursday, December 23, 2004

Feel the Christmas spirit of ribena berry Christmas trees, Polar trains and albino/geisha Santa Clauses!!!!!!!!
Deck the halls with bloody corpses....falalalala....
Ladies and gentlemen....I have been imbued with the spirit of Christmas!
It took quite a while for me to feel the Christmas spirit...at last twenty years to be exact....lol...since i have NEVER felt very Christmassy in my entire life.... I used to be a scrooge who hates Christmas... all those bloody nostalgic carols and annoying wholesome Christmas tv shows - they never show any good shows during Christmas! Halloween is when they show good shows! Horror film fest!
But this year...the singing spitting laughing spirit of Christmas has hit me smack in the head! I think it all started because the Laughing Lizard is full of Christmas spirit and she didn't understand why myself and Kelly-Mandy weren't. And I think some of it must have rubbed off me. And partly also because we went to watch the Polar Express (which must be THE Christmas movie this year), the huge Christmas tree decorated with Ribena-berries-esque decorations at KLCC and because of the albino-like Santa Claus running around KLCC with his high-heel-wearing Santarina in tow. Trust me. I have never seen a Santa Claus with so much powder on. Kelly-Mandy suggested that if he had been a woman he would have been a geisha.
Aaaand....i have gotten all my Christmas present shopping done and over with! Yes, I have been a good Christmas girl this year! Even all wrapped up already! I think I spent more money on Christmas pressies this year than any other year. And I even put lots of thought into buying what they would like the most, instead of just buying what fits in my budget best. I totally blew my budget. And the worst thing is that I think my family doesn't even seem very grateful this year. Maybe they're just not used to me being so Christmassy. My mom stares at me very oddly.
Oh well. Then I was playing Charlotte Church's old Christmas CD until I finally got sick of it and put on some good old Resident Evil II soundtrack.
Yaaaay!

(0) comments

Monday, December 20, 2004

just came back from watching Carmen....it was fun, i thought at first that we had gotten seats way at the back and would have a had time seeing anything but as fate would have it, i had accidentally chosen the front seats and so we got to sit right next to the orchestra pit. yay! the only bad thing is that we had to crane our necks all the way up to read the subtitles being projected way at the top of the stage so my neck really got all twisted up moving back and forth between the subtitles and the singers.
Christmas is coming! Must go shopping! Presents still have not been bought!


(0) comments

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Being a goddess is a full-time hard job. So many decisions, so little time. Like today. I had to decide whether I wanted five or six sacrifices. If i wanted five, then should i make it three females and two males or three males and two females? What should they wear? Some flowers? Perhaps a few shell necklaces? Should they be beheaded or thrown into a lava pit? Perhaps if they're beheaded they should be upon a stone altar? Or one made of bamboo? Perhaps some giant lotus leaves stitched together? I know that I should have a standard traditional scarificial ceremony but i like a little change every now and then. It makes things more interesting. I'm an open-minded goddess.

(0) comments

Sunday, December 12, 2004

HAPPPYYYYY BIRRRRRTHDAY EEEEEEEE LIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNN
actually it's belated since it's already sunday and i was mostly comatose during saturday but i gave her the Love-A-Lot Care Bear on Thursday so it doesn't matter...
Just got back from clubbing....I'm suppose to be packing for my trip tomorrow but I just came onine to check my mail...and i've eaten so much i think that i'm going to explode soon...and i'm probably going to fall asleep in the car tomorrow...
all right must go and pack!

(0) comments

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Evening.
Today as I sat on my bed reading in the evening, my windows were wide open and curtains pushed back, and dusk was creeping over the world, the "dim" as L.M. Montgomery put it. The most you can see from the bed is the roof of the back porch of the house opposite, red-tiled and supported with black beams, and its windows loit with a soft golden glow, along with the thick green leaves of the trees hovering over the back walls, and it jst gives you a sense of hovering int he sky, balanced in the open air, as if my room was not part of a house but flying in the sky, or set among the high trees. A Dusk candle burns on my desk by the window, the soft warm golden light washing over old books and papers and pens and ginitng off my gold lantern, reflecting off the rosewood top of my desk. There is music playing, "I Dare You to Move", by Switchfood, and the air is cool, there is a sense of old magic, of balancing between this world and the next, like in my childhood.
In the distance, there is the sound of dogs barking and the clinking silverware of neighbors sitting down to dinner.
I like the evening.

(0) comments

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Oh, I totally forgot to add! The Houston Rockets beat the Philadelphia 76ers by one point on Saturday in Texas!!!!!!! YAYAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!!!
These are the kind of games i like...where everything gets all frantic and the teams are just separated by a point and you can't tell who's going to win in the last quarter...and then the team that you're rooting for wins!!!!!!!!
And today....they'll face off the new orleans hornets! Go Rockets! Go Rockets! Go Rockets!
Sadly, it's most likely i won't be able to watch that game....it was just by freak miraculous chance i got to catch Saturday's game....sniff...
By the way, I think I had a psychic dream last night! I dreamt a lot of things which I couldn't remember but two things which I definitely remembered dreaming about was 1) someone - i can't remember who - trying to force me to swallow down a whole bottle of cod liver oil, but i was resisting and turning my head away and refusing like mad and 2) that me and farah met up and we were yakking like mad. And then when i woke up, farah had sent a message on my handphone and tonight me mom tried to force some cod liver oil capsules into me, except i resisted and turned my head and refused like mad. How's that for coincidences of the psychics of the world???

(0) comments

Monday, December 06, 2004

Shop Music: Switchfoot - I Dare You To Move.
I'm thinking of sunset-washed oceans by shores that lie far away. I'm thinking about getting away.
As much as this place holds a lot of familiar memories, there's this sudden longing to pack my bags and leave.
What??? you may ask. You just got here!
I know, and it's not as if I'm having a great time here, it's great to see old friends, visit old places, I haven't had a single free moment to myself here and all that, but it's just not the same. Something is missing.
Like I said, I'm thinking of sunset-washed oceans by shores that lie far away.
Moving on, moving on.
Don't mind me, I'm just in a bittersweet melancholy mood tonight at this late hour of this late night. And the only wine in the house is the bottle I bought home which I'm not suppose to open yet.
Damn.
I think I'll go write some poetry.
By the way, I came across this line in one of the blogs which I like to visit a lot, www.merrymaudlin.blogspot.com - this chick has some of the best quotes on her sidebar, my particular favourite is "Let us so live/ that when we come to die/ even the undertaker would be sorry" - and she added some new lines and this one went "The real reason for not committing suicide is because you always know how swell life gets again after the hell is over." That spells out my feelings exactly! Everytime you reach that point of suicide, the only thing that stops you is knowing that there IS sunshine just ahead. Well, me, anyway. A true thought. :)
Okay, I will stop this and go vent in poetry.

(0) comments
Weather: Humid
Shop Music: Green Day "American Idiot"
I'm baaaack....a Ryan returning to Chino from the O.C.
After a loong time! Since I arrived home in what is probably the most polluted valley in the world, I have been busy busy meeting up with old friends and finishing that very last assignment for Debut (mmm, interviewing young male pilots!), being robbed and stabbing people, not to mention it took a while to figure out how to hook up the home internet connection to my laptop. But all is well now! I have a feeling this will be a fairly long entry, though, since i haven't been blogging in ages and anyone who reads this blog knows how long my normal entries can get! Aaaah....I miss blogging! Does that make me a computer nerd? Who cares? As long as I'm a pretty computer nerd *preens and ignores the usual chorus of rolled-eyed sighs*
Anyway! How should i describe my feelings returning home? Home? It doesn't feel like home here anymore. Everything seems smaller, not as great as I thought it would be. Maybe my expectations were too high. I don't know. Maybe I should have expected it. We knew even before we left a year ago that it was the time to move on already, that we could never look back and return to what was. I should have known better than to expect things to be the same. And even though I keep inadvertently referring to the most isolated city in the world as home now (which often earns me dagger stares from mom who demands "whaddayamean? isn't THIS polluted valley isn't ur home now?!?"), I know that Isolated City won't permanently be my home any more than Polluted Valley is my home. Life will always change, you'll move on, here is where i call up one of my favourite mottos: "Never look back. Always look forward!" But then again, this STILL is the place i came from and i still DO love this little polluted valley. ScreamingSour, you are right, we are like the great oak trees that hippies chained themselves to, it's time for us to continue growing and spreading our branches all over the world, but we can never forget where our roots come from!!!!!!!!!
Okay, enough of this moving on sentiment. My "old home" has not disappointed me! Less than a week of coming home, my car has been broken into - although by great lockpickers who left my lock undamaged and my car untouched and unfortunately stolen Constance's backpack -, Constance's promise to take me clubbing ended with us in some new club "recommended" by her boyfriend which turned out to be full of ecstacy-high shrill-pitched ah bengs, I've been getting lost on all the new roads which magically sprouted up while I was gone and being harrassed by ugly losers at every corner of the road. Ah, KL, i've missed you!
What else? To make up for the bad clubbing experience with Constance, the Pope got me into the VIP section of Novou and Potato took me to Bar Flam for some whiskey cokes with her colleagues. Ah, life as a working girl for her! 1u didn't disappoint me - still love that place! - Farah is wearing a headscarf, and me and the Iced Milo Bear are taking hour-long walks everyday in a fitness attempt but I think our mouths are getting a better workout than our legs. *grins*
What else? Alexander is probably one of the most boring movies ever made - Iced Milo Bear fell asleep in the middle of a fight scene! a fight scene! that should be proof of how boring it is! - and speaking of movies, they were showing the Terminal on the flight home which I think is really a bad idea considering that we were on a PLANE heading towards a TERMINAL, Catwoman could have been better. In fact, Without A Paddle is probably the best movie I've seen since leaving Isolated City! I think that's because I needed a laugh after all the bloody depressing movies I've been watching since I got back - Terminal, Little Black Book, Alexander, Catwoman, Troy... or maybe it's just me projecting my this-isn't-home-anymore emotions...
Right....I should quit while I'm ahead and while my laptop battery is still running (there is no place to fit my charger in here!) Au Revoir, everyone, until later! *Kisses*


(0) comments

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?