Darkschunt 
Thursday, September 02, 2004
I nearly went homicidal on myself the other day! I was lying in bed, with my arms kind of pinned under me as how I always sleep, thinking I should finally get out of bed. My right hand is dangerously near my throat and as I moved, my thumbnail swipes across the center of my throat as do how knives go across people's throat in the movies and I froze at the pain. I become sure that I have just suceeded in killing myself with my thumbnail and drag myself out of bed and over to the mirror to make sure my hair looks good before I collaspe and die.
Well, I didn't exactly have a blood-gushing gash but there was definitely blood and now there is a thin red line across the centre of my throat which looks like somebody tried to hold me hostage with a very shaky knife-holding arm. I knew my nails were lethal but I had no idea how lethal. Lethal enough to almost accidentally commit suicide with.
Woke up from a nightmare this morning. It was horrible. I was part of this tour group and the husband of this couple also in the tour group got posessed. I can't remember exactly what happened but I think he had been killing off people and we got stranded at this house by a river. I don't know when we began to suspect him but at the end of the dream I was on top of him strangling him and I looked into his eyes and they were white with thin black pupils that looked totally non-human and it was the demon in him which was trying to posess me now and transfer to my body but I knew what he was doing so I wasn't going to fall for it. Anyway, those eyes were SCARY. I was deathly afraid of those eyes, I can still remember them now. And anyway, he must have died because later the wife and I were standing by the window upstairs and I was trying to comfort her when the tour guide came up to the room and told us to come downstairs where everyone was because he was still afraid that the evil spirits were still lingeirng around and it was better for everyone to be together in one room. We came downstairs, which kind of looks like my house back home, and that is when the phone rings. I pick up the phone and it's this weird male voice asking to speak to the wife. I hand the phone to the wife and she picks it up and she goes all pale and from what she says, we all know it is the husband calling from hell. But he is speaking in chinese and she gets scared so she pretends she doesn't understand and she hands the phone to this old chinese ah ma who doesn't know what is going on and she talks to the guy and says to the wife, "it's your husband calling." (she doesn't know the husband is dead). Then the wife gets even more scared but she's forced to take back the phone and then she looks at me and says, "he wants to talk to you." But I'm like, "Yeah, no way am I talking to him on a phone line from hell, not after the time he tried to posess me while I was strangling him!" so I say "no way" and turn away and that's when I see this horrible tall figure like an old but incredibly tall chinese grandmother lying on her back over the piano bench and she rises in a completely scary and un-humanely flexible way and starts walking towards me and I just know she's a ghost, but you have to pretend not to be afraid or give any sign that you know they're ghosts, so when she stands on her way, I go, "Oh, sorry, grandma, am i in your way? here" I smoothly extricate myself out of her way before she can grab me with her arms, "you go right ahead." and I hurriedly walk away. And I think, this is when my friend calls me and saves me from this horrible nightmare. And then I remember that it's the Hungry Ghost Festival going on and I'm like, man, I hope I'm not getting all these visits from them in my dreams again!!! Am I not suppose to be safe when I'm an ocean away???
Earlier today I went out for a smoke on the front balcony but one of my flatmates has hung his clothes there to dry so obviously I'm a good person and wouldn't contaminate his freshly laundered clothes with my evil smoke so I went round to the fire escape at the back and sat there puffing away with the sun shining on me and spring insects all around. As I sat there, Lene Marlin's song was playing through my head - "I'm sitting down there but hey you can't see me/kind of invisible if I say so myself" and I was like "yeah, no one can see me down here on these steps" and I was just basically all peaceful and stuff down on the steps.
Well, I didn't exactly have a blood-gushing gash but there was definitely blood and now there is a thin red line across the centre of my throat which looks like somebody tried to hold me hostage with a very shaky knife-holding arm. I knew my nails were lethal but I had no idea how lethal. Lethal enough to almost accidentally commit suicide with.
Woke up from a nightmare this morning. It was horrible. I was part of this tour group and the husband of this couple also in the tour group got posessed. I can't remember exactly what happened but I think he had been killing off people and we got stranded at this house by a river. I don't know when we began to suspect him but at the end of the dream I was on top of him strangling him and I looked into his eyes and they were white with thin black pupils that looked totally non-human and it was the demon in him which was trying to posess me now and transfer to my body but I knew what he was doing so I wasn't going to fall for it. Anyway, those eyes were SCARY. I was deathly afraid of those eyes, I can still remember them now. And anyway, he must have died because later the wife and I were standing by the window upstairs and I was trying to comfort her when the tour guide came up to the room and told us to come downstairs where everyone was because he was still afraid that the evil spirits were still lingeirng around and it was better for everyone to be together in one room. We came downstairs, which kind of looks like my house back home, and that is when the phone rings. I pick up the phone and it's this weird male voice asking to speak to the wife. I hand the phone to the wife and she picks it up and she goes all pale and from what she says, we all know it is the husband calling from hell. But he is speaking in chinese and she gets scared so she pretends she doesn't understand and she hands the phone to this old chinese ah ma who doesn't know what is going on and she talks to the guy and says to the wife, "it's your husband calling." (she doesn't know the husband is dead). Then the wife gets even more scared but she's forced to take back the phone and then she looks at me and says, "he wants to talk to you." But I'm like, "Yeah, no way am I talking to him on a phone line from hell, not after the time he tried to posess me while I was strangling him!" so I say "no way" and turn away and that's when I see this horrible tall figure like an old but incredibly tall chinese grandmother lying on her back over the piano bench and she rises in a completely scary and un-humanely flexible way and starts walking towards me and I just know she's a ghost, but you have to pretend not to be afraid or give any sign that you know they're ghosts, so when she stands on her way, I go, "Oh, sorry, grandma, am i in your way? here" I smoothly extricate myself out of her way before she can grab me with her arms, "you go right ahead." and I hurriedly walk away. And I think, this is when my friend calls me and saves me from this horrible nightmare. And then I remember that it's the Hungry Ghost Festival going on and I'm like, man, I hope I'm not getting all these visits from them in my dreams again!!! Am I not suppose to be safe when I'm an ocean away???
Earlier today I went out for a smoke on the front balcony but one of my flatmates has hung his clothes there to dry so obviously I'm a good person and wouldn't contaminate his freshly laundered clothes with my evil smoke so I went round to the fire escape at the back and sat there puffing away with the sun shining on me and spring insects all around. As I sat there, Lene Marlin's song was playing through my head - "I'm sitting down there but hey you can't see me/kind of invisible if I say so myself" and I was like "yeah, no one can see me down here on these steps" and I was just basically all peaceful and stuff down on the steps.
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